Wednesday, October 31, 2001

I have one word for Russ Smith of the New York Press: 1978 (The bitter bit about the Yanks is toward the end of the column. Read on, and see how he invalidates his point entirely by announcing his favorite team: the Red Sux)
I'm having a very Halloween-like day so far...
It's scary when you pass certain places, say the 34th street subway station, and you see police tape and lots of police officers and just know it's another anthrax/bomb scare. It's becoming a weekly occurence. I know before I get to the station because of the lack of foot traffic on 34th Street.

Then, I get to the office which is swealtering like the fires of hell. The managing editors armoire, (which is in front of a vent) was so hot, she said it felt like a wood burning stove. I'm wearing a skirt, and I am sweating. We all complained yesterday and the building people (our best friends in this place) claimed the heat was turned off. Uh, no.

And for my rant of the day: Rosie O'Donnell making herself quite apparent in a yellow coat, sitting right behind homeplate at last night's game. She, like the Donald, yacked though the whole game. Some body has to keep these famous people who can't get enough of themselves away from Yankee Stadium.

Tuesday, October 30, 2001

I'm not the only one who thinks those 24 promos are out of control!

Let me gush about "Band of Brothers" for a moment (here it is, Dexter!). I don't understand people who complain that this epic isn't Hollywood enough for them. Because it was chaotic in the beginning, and no main character came out of Easy company, people didn't want to give it a chance. Well, I'm usually one of those who likes gooey, warm character studies where everything works out right, but this time I am enthralled with the story. It's war, for crying out loud! And a true story. So of course it's not going to play out like a cliche war flick. EW gave it a blah review (surprise, surprise. I don't read their reviews anymore. They hate everything, except "Serendipity" which got an A-. It was cute and all, but an A-??), complaining that our age group is sick of the whole 'greatest generation' stuff being shoved down our throats. I hate that idea, too, since it's no one's fault as to what generation they're born into. That would mean there has to be a second-best generation, and a worst. But this movie isn't about that at all, which is why I find it so appealing. It's about how they all got through the battles and the awful things they had to see. There's no 'you should look up to them because they're better than you' mentality. It shows how human beings react and survive in the most horrific of conditions — nothing glorified about it.

On the same note, I finished "Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire" and I have to say it semi-depressed me. It's good to know that kids aren't being force fed warm, fuzzy, overly-PC stories anymore and that they can read something fun (and pretty damn good) with a sad ending and the kids still think it's great. I bet my old company would never tap the book to be put in schools -- people *gasp* die in it! And use weapons! And have faults! But that's another rant for another day.
There's a buzz that with Bush going to the Yankee game tonight, that the Stadium will be on an even higher alert. If ANYTHING happens to ANYONE in that ballpark — fan, Yankee, Diamondback, stadium worker, police officer, president, pigeon — so help me God, I will hunt down that terrorist and kill him/them with my own two hands. Better yet, get Randy Johnson to throw a few of his 98 MPH fastballs at the American-hater's fugly head, while Roger Clemens hovers over him with a broken bat. You mess with my Yankee Stadium, there will be hell to pay.

Monday, October 29, 2001

I'm in Gryffindor! If you don't know what that means, well then you're just a muggle , aren't you?
I think the Yanks are a bit confused with warm temperatures in October. They need to come home and play in some 40-degree weather! Maybe that's the ticket. Contrary to the way some fans think, I'm not jumping off any bridges. I've never understood why fans of other teams think it's going to kill me when they come over and rub in the fact that the Yanks lost. First off, I'm never mean (publicly) to them about their rotten teams as I believe in baseball karma; what goes around comes around, as one particuarly smarmy fan in my office found out when his team was ousted from the playoffs recently. (PS, in Webster's dictionary the word smarmy has the term 'New Yorker' in its definition. This kind of bothers me. Anyway.) Secondly, I have a little more faith in my team than that. Sheesh.
Fox is pissing me off again, however. With their new form of advertising (computer generated crap for Ally McBeal and Boston Public posted on a green wall behind home plate) and transparent announcing team, I'm about ready to kick my television. First off, Tim McCarver has to stop stating the obvious. In every situation, he acts like no one at home would think "gee, maybe Soriano will be running on the 3-2 pitch with 2 out." Joe Buck has to stop sounding prophetic on every pitch. Like when Johnson has 2 outs in the inning with an 0-2 count and he starts in on "Johnson has 7 strikeouts on the night" just so you know when strike three comes 2 seconds later he can say "Now 8". And Steve Lyons and that bitchy southern woman in the studio have to stop being so obvious in their Yankee hating. It's their God given right to hate whatever teams they want in private. But it's unprofessional as hell to let your opinion come through (no matter how much you try to cover it) while being a journalist. Bob Costas is just as guilty when he gushes about the Yanks. I love his opinions and that he loves the Yanks, but he even makes me ill sometimes, and I ardently adore the Bombers! It's just not cool. I think they missed that whole impartiality thing in journalism class or something.

Friday, October 26, 2001

I finally got to go to Serendipity the restaurant last night, after hearing Dexter and Vicki rave about the place for almost 2 years now. I must say the food is pretty damn good. Especially the frozen hot chocolates! The service is kind of weird, though.

Tomorrow is Steph and Carolyn's joint birthday bash in a yet-to-be-decided Hoboken bar. It's also Game 1 of the World Series. Yippee!!!! If there are any frontrunners in the bar (I love Hoboken. My family, including the reason I'm a Yankee fan, my dad, are all from there, Dexter, Vicki and Chris call it home and Des, Carolyn and I are probably moving there within the next 6 months, God willing. But there are a few pretentious, nausea-inducing NY wannabes inhabiting the mile-square city) I will club them with my beer bottle. That's a promise.

Speaking of, are fans who leave 9,000 seats empty when their team makes the playoffs (Game 1 of the NLCS) really worthy of seeing a World Series title won? Arizona must be full of front runners as well. Remind me never to move there

Thursday, October 25, 2001

We have entered the new era of germ warfare -- terrorism by uncooked chicken!

Speaking of Chicken, my Yankee-loving fowl has taken to wearing an American flag with his Yankee cap and guido necklace. Maybe he will bring the U.S. as much luck as he's brought the Yanks in recent years.

Wednesday, October 24, 2001

Not only do these anthrax psychos have the worst chicken scratch writing, they can't spell for shit. Medicines are spelled properly in the dictionary, mr. terrortwit.

Tuesday, October 23, 2001

From Paul C. Smith of A very interesting comment by Mariano...
The Yankees also have some special motivation this season. "I believe we will bring the world championship to the city of New York, because these people deserve it," said first baseman Tino Martinez. "I'd like to say it is destiny. But, all I know is we represent this great city. And we know that the people of New York and the victims of the tragedy of Sept. 11, many of them are Yankee fans and they are counting on us.We believe we can help ease their pain."

Rivera took it one giant step farther.

"I think the Good Lord is a Yankee," Rivera said.
"It's great to be young and a Yankee," Waite Hoyt once said. I'd like to add that it's great to be young and a Yankee fan.
YAHOOOOOOOOO! If I thought the Yanks would come back from 2 games down to the A's, and beat Seattle in only 5, I would've thought it was asking for too much. But damned if this team just showed my underrating of them. I swear, the only month I don't mind being wrong is October. Or any other time the Yanks pull some magic out of their interlocking NY, midnight-blue caps. You hear so many people who hate the Yankees go on and on about how they're tired of seeing them in the World Series. But hasn't it been fun every year they've made it? I mean, they school the Braves not once, but twice, cap off a huge season by sweeping the Padres (a nice team, but there was history to be made) and beat the Mets in the battle royale last season. They say the Yanks buy their teams, but au contraire, Jeter, Bernie!, Jorge, Pettitte, and Rivera were home-grown, Brosius came off the scrap heap, Tino came via a trade as did Roger Clemens. They pay them the money to keep them there once they'be been acquired, not lure them away from sweet little teams in the Midwest or something evil like that.
Oh man, I'm ranting and I shouldn't be. The focus is the D'backs. They've beaten Schilling and Johnson before. I won't get cocky or excited, but you better believe i'll be humming "Ain't No Mountain High Enough" for at least a few more days.

Monday, October 22, 2001

Since I don't want to jinx them, I'm not going to say anything about theYanks (except offer, in the words of Mel Allen, 'how about that'?!?)but I do want to complain about some of the boring ass advertising we have to sit through during these games. I think I have the promo for Fox's 24 stored in my memory so that I can pull it out and recite it for my friends at holiday parties. And are those 2 idiots going from ballpark to ballpark in the mastercard commercials ever going to finish? I bet they're saving the last two stadiums for the World Series. I just hope it's not some new "people-are-more-interested-in-the-ballpark-experience-not-the-game" corporate-named place. And the worst excuse for ad time had to come last night for John Hancock. You see a woman whining to her husband about their stock portfolio or something, worrying that their 'safety net' isn't safe anymore. The tag line for the commercial was "the average age for a widow is 56" This made me irate because 1) how freaking morbid to show in a city that was directly affected by the attacks -- just scare all the people into thinking their spouse is going to die and SOON! So, you'd better sign up with John Hancock and 2) HOW FREAKING SEXIST! Gee, I forgot that women can work for a living. Why can't wifey-poo go out and get a job? Like the rest of us! As I sat there, agape and momentarily distracted from my real reason of viewing, my dad said "Well, she can sell the Mercedes SUV, get rid of the mansion and ditch the country club member ship." At least I'm not the only one who saw that it was probably the most out-of-date, blue-suit thought up
commercial I've ever seen. Boy did it piss me off!
Anyway, the Yanks play tonight.....

Tuesday, October 16, 2001

All Aboard! That's right, here comes the Yankee Bandwagon Express, and it's just in time for all those frontrunners to jump on. If there is one thing I can't stand in the playoffs in any sport, it's the frontrunner. He/she who has no interest in a team whatsoever during the regular season, but suddenly deems themself 'such a big fan' when the big stuff comes round, basically just to look cool. And you'll find tons of them in NY. None of them remember the lean years in the early 90s, when Melido Perez was the Yanks best pitcher. And I'll bet none of them can name 2 pitchers in the current Yankee bullpen. What saddens me is that they somehow get tickets to these games while the rest of us just make rude comments about them during the game [see my cell phone entry. No real fan brings them to a game, anyway.] while adding one more stomach ulcer from the worry/love of one's favorite team. No, you'll never see a frontrunner chugging Mylanta in October. I pity them. They'll never get it.
They never cease to amaze me. Even when I've steeled myself for defeat, just happy to see them in the playoffs, they do stuff that makes me marvel. Derek Jeter, who I've been a bit hard on this year, embodies his love for the game by throwing himself into the stands to catch a foul ball. He may be portrayed as the team play/partyboy, but in truth his only love and lust seems to be playing good baseball for a team he's adored since he was a kid. Damn, the whole team gives me joy.

The Donald was there, unfortunately, this time accompanied by Regis. But Rege at least seemed into the game. Donnie boy was gone way before the game was over. Some big dude was in his place, prompting my father to say that Mr. Trump had probably been eaten by the guy. I hope to god he's not back for the rest of the playoffs.

Monday, October 15, 2001

Hurricane Karen has been downgraded to just a tropical storm. Sigh.

So, after a weekend of barely any sleep and much reunionizing, I return from Delaware feeling better about myself and back to a laid-back mentality. Don't know if it was the 2 hour drive or just seeing old faces who seemingly love you no matter how much you hate your job. And I didn't find one person completely happy with their job. It's sad, but I found that relieving. Oprah's right -- we are an impatient, semi-stupid generation to think we're going to find our dream job right out of college. Duh!

The Yanks are back in it! Which means I will not be taking phone calls tonight.

Thursday, October 11, 2001

I know the real reason the Yankees lost last night and it had nothing to do with lack of runs. It was sitting behind homeplate, in a suit and tie, yacking its head off and looking downright smug among the other rich and pathetic who seep out of the woodwork for playoff games. Yes, I'm talking about Donald Trump. How could you miss his ugly, pompous mug? It was there everytime someone came to bat. And since he's never been at a game before (or never been that obvious), and in no way a fan (a real fan doesn't shmooze while in great seats like that) he brought bad luck. We can only hope he's not there tonight. And all the other rich scum who were out there last night, dressed like someone going to a polo match. I am only glad that this ban on bringing stuff into the stadium seems to have applied to cell phones. I didn't see anyone yacking obnoxiously while the Yanks are trying to get the third out.

Just heard a newscaster say the Yanks are backed into a corner after losing last night. Ummm, hello? It's only game one. I've learned better than to have a hissy fit this early on. Then again, this was the station that during its weather report for tonight's game had NLDS written above it. Probably a bitter Mets fan is to blame for it.

Wednesday, October 10, 2001

I'm guessing the loads of New Yorkers in pissed-off moods this morning aren't Yankee fans. Why is there a need to be grumpy when there's a World Series to be won???

Osama, you ass wipe, we're not laughing with you, we're laughing at you!

Monday, October 08, 2001

After a few days of sinus infection, I feel pissed enough to write. Last night I was made to wonder why HBO doesn't call its new series The WARPED Mind of the Married Man. The show must be written by a very hopeful Mike Binder because since when does anyone that average, even dorky looking, get a great looking wife and then wonder about cheating on her with all these other great looking women who want him? Even his friend on the show, a very scary gent, is paired up with a woman straight out of the Victoria's Secret Hall of Fame. What I want to know is, where do you see average, even homely looking women with hot guys as hubbies? NOWHERE. It's just not fair. I know, looks aren't everything. So why aren't these dudes given just-as-average- looking wives? The male ego is a very strange thing...

So, dear old Barry hit his record setter and his team is out of the playoffs. Gee, darn.

I finished Harry Potter #3 and am now working on #4 which is annoying me because I never like the early stages before he gets to Hogwarts and it's going to take 130 some-odd pages to get to school. I hope it's worth it.

The Chicken is gearing up for the playoffs. He says that he has no qualms about the Yanks chances and is not worried about Jason Giambi. Good to know.

Wednesday, October 03, 2001

2 things really pissed me off last night:
1) Barry Bonds: He's at bat against the Astros in the 7th inning, having gotten, gasp, only a single earlier in the game. The Giants are up 3-1, and during a 3-0 count him, the Astros pitcher decides to just intentionally walk him. Barry promptly, disgustedly, tosses his bat away, shaking his head. WHAT DOES HE EXPECT? The Astros were 2 runs down and IN A PENNANT RACE. This wasn't a 14-0 blowout of the Expos.Oh, I forgot, the pitchers are supposed to give Barry what he wants just because he's Barry. I'm just not going to watch from now on. In all honesty, I really don't care if he gets the record since it's just looking like it will be a yearly occurence from now on.
2) Shows benefitting from the tragedy: The West Wing and Third Watch are doing shows about terrorism, and Third Watch is doing one that takes place the day before and the day after Sept. 11. Why am I mad? THESE ARE FICITIONAL CHARACTERS, and it just seems extremely TACKY that we're supposed to believe that these people really know what was going on in NY and DC during these attacks, when they were safe in Hollywood. They have no freaking clue what it was like. And to use it for ratings is just pathetic. They'll say it's because they want to help the nation, but don't believe it.

Tuesday, October 02, 2001

Eureka! I've found my new career -- Professional Scapegoat!
Yes, Jim's mantra of 'You're all assholes, and I know it' is coming in handy today. The attacks have made me realize that petty job crap isn't worth much, but it's still a pain in the rear.
After watching the last episode of Ric Burns' New York documentary, I have a newfound distaste for Robert Moses. What a jerk. And they named a beach after him, which is kind of silly because the man seemed so against open space. But what really got me were the people who fought him on building a highway through lower Manhattan. They were the first residents to overturn an idea of his. The things is, what would they think of their once blue collar neighborhood now? Now you have to be stinking rich to live there. Not at all like the neighborhoods they were fighting for -- of all creeds and backgrounds..