Tuesday, March 30, 2004

So Sports Illustrated is picking the Cubs to win the World Series this year. Aw, isn't that sweet and inspiring and...cliché. The whole "underdog" team (even though the Cubbies are going to be formidable and definitely NOT an underdog, but sports reporters want us to feel differently) wins it all is about as tired as the Yankees being the root of all evil. I know they had to pick someone (and I'm GLAD it's not the Yankees -- I like flying under the radar, even though that's kind of hard with the expectations on them this year) but if we have to deal with another Gee Whiz year of the media hyping the Cubs and the Red Sox overcoming their curses I'll just gag. Find a new angle, people. Quick.
Game bad, now at work.
Tonya watched sans Doc Otis.
We are sleepy now.

But Tino homered. Yay for Tino!!
Tie game in the 6th
Now 7 in the morning.
Can't say that often.

Either I'm so tired I'm miss-hearing things or Michael Kay just called A-Rod a cyborg. Uh, what? Oh, wait, I mean:

A-Rod's a cyborg
A rich cyborg with black eye
Whoa! Joe Girardi!
What the HELL am I doing up this early? So help me MLB, don't do this to us again. Because the novelty kinda wears off when you realize you only slept 5 1/2 hours last night. Sigh.

Aside from that, it's time to start the Yankee Haikus...Oh, hi Tino!...Here we go:

Yankees play today
Early morning watch from bed
To see our Moose pitch.

Monday, March 29, 2004

Well, even though the Yankees are starting the season tomorrow, I refuse to make the traditional Opening Day Cupcakes till their back on American soil. So y'all just got to wait a week.

But I will be blogging tomorrow entirely in Haiku format to honor the occassion. I will have to write one about Moose and Tino and A-Rod...all while waking up at 5 a.m. Maybe I should wait to see how much creativity I have after losing two hours of sleep...

Sunday, March 28, 2004

So I'm watching the Yankees/Yomiuri Giants game right now (on replay of course. No way in hell I was getting up at 5 a.m. to watch an exhibition game. Tuesday, however, is another matter...) and they show Don Mattingly standing in the dugout and I was like "Holy shit!" I had to do a double take, like I'd been transported back in time and Mattingly was still playing. And then I realized he hasn't played in 9 years and I felt really old. The Chicken was like, "Who's that?" Sigh.

Anyway, the Japanese fans are awesome. They actually cheered for Matsui to hit a home run and he did! And they're totally into the whole getting behind the home team thing with their cheering and singing. They even just cheered for Posada when he hit his homer. Now if they can only get rid of the Astroturf, they might just get Cool Dude status...

Friday, March 26, 2004

Oh, and that new Jets Stadium design has to be the fugliest thing I've seen in a long time. I'd be more worried about the look of it than the hoards of people it's going to attract if I lived around there. And hopefully that ends the Yankees to the West Side discussion, and gets them thinking about improving Yankee Stadium. Because if they moved into a stadium as ugly and souless looking as the one planned for the Jets, I might have to cry.
So, Sasquatch is not only the heaviest walker on the planet, but the most unnecessary walker on the planet. What does that mean, you ask? Well, it means he just seems to stomp aimlessy around his room. I swear, he paced around last night till late and woke up at quarter of 5 this morning for more stomping fun. With music this time. He walked so loud, it made things on my shelves vibrate. It doesn't help that in his jaunts through his room (which is as big as mine, and frankly, there isn't that much room to walk, but he finds it alright), he intermittenly sits on his creaky ass bed, and gets up again two seconds later. Oh, there he is now! THEN WHAT WAS THE POINT OF GETTING UP AT THE BUTT CRACK OF DAWN, SASSY?! Here I thought if he was up that early he might be going on a business trip or something. I guess I'd never be that lucky.

Thursday, March 25, 2004

I love how all the NY-area TV stations were going so overboard last night to make it look like A-Rod was out for the season instead of having a black eye. The whole "Bad news for Yankee fans and their 25 million dollar man" thing was just freaking ridiculous. A ball bounced off the ground and hit him in the cheek. If I hadn't have seen it happen live (where the YES Network announcers were way chill about it and didn't seem worried) I would've thought he'd broken his leg or something.

It's weird, but having worked in the media, I now have no patience for sensationalized news shows, papers or magazines. I know how the truth gets stretched a bit on the cover of something to get a reader to buy it. If you don't believe me, pick up US Weekly, read the headlines and then the stories and don't tell me it's a bunch of crap to suck you in, then disappoint you. At least we know the National Enquirer is there to, uh, lie a little. But just know that when the other publications out there are figuring out what to put on the cover, they know EXACTLY what they are doing when the headline doesn't really match the story inside...and I assume the same goes for television.

Anyway, I'm glad A-Rod's OK, or we never would've heard the end of the Red Sox boasting on THAT one...

Tuesday, March 23, 2004

You know what sucks most about working 9-5? Missing all the quality children's programming on TV. I've found that I just love the cartoon Maisy, which is totally meant for like 4-year-olds, but cracks me up just the same. My favorite character is Charley the Crocodile. While all the animals make funny noises as speech, Charley's, uh, voice just rocks. He sounds like Barney from the Simpsons, but drunker. OK, lunch is over and I must revert back to 26...
And so it begins. It's my week-off-to-write vacation, just so I can see if I can discipline myself to stay at home and write if the occasion should ever arise where I get paid to do such a thing. And let's just say it's way awesome to not have to be at work. Heh heh heh....

Friday, March 19, 2004

Um, hi, Snow? You can totally stop now. I don't know if you got the memo, but this is the mid-Atlantic. We get one, to two days of snow in a row max. Not FOUR days. And spring starts tomorrow, so please go away.

Wednesday, March 17, 2004

Oh, man. Tonya had one of the funniest moments of the year yesterday. I was sitting in my cube, across from her as she interviewed the woman from the last Average Joe. I hear her ask the question "So how long had you and Fabio been broken up?" and I almost lost it. When she hung up she said it took everything in her not to bust out laughing while asking the question. Because, seriously. How often do you get to ask someone about their breakup with FABIO??
Happy Dad's birthday/St. Patrick's Day/Delaware acceptance letter day anniversary! With so much to celebrate, why did I come to work today? Oh, right, to see all the drunk people coming and going from the parade! Not that I'll actually get to see the parade, chained to my desk as I am, even though it's literally a block away. But I'm sure there will be residual drunkards roaming the streets during the evening rush, so I'll be waiting.

I freaking loved American Idol last night -- it exposed the mediocre singers for who they are (ahem, SiNOTra, and thank you Randy Jackson for actually pointing out that he sings LIKE Dean Martin, but is nowhere near Dean Martin-Like) and the good ones just rocked. Or grooved, I guess, since it was Soul Night.

Tuesday, March 16, 2004

I saw the coolest thing today -- the grass near my apartment that's normally brown and dead-looking is starting to turn green. Woo-hoo! Too bad it's probably going to get killed by the nice out-of-nowhere snowstorm we're supposed to get today. Boo.

Monday, March 15, 2004

I'm pretty much over The Sopranos right now. Maybe there's something wrong with me, but the past two episodes have been beyond boring and I'm tired of this "They're just setting stuff up for the season" crap. Because that's exactly what they've done in every other season except the first one -- build stuff up AND NOTHING HAPPENS. The acting on the show is superb, but I don't watch TV for great performances alone.

And I had the best mashed potatoes I've ever had in my entire life at Angelo and Maxie's in NY on Friday night. The steak was pretty damn good, too, but the potatoes -- pricey, but magnificent! I must find the recipe...

Friday, March 12, 2004

Apparently, the Catholics of Boston are not getting a dispensation to eat hot dogs on Good Friday at Fenway Park. I am so waiting for the NY Archdiosese to be like "Well Yankee fans can eat hot dogs at Yankee Stadium that day, so there!"

Speaking of, that's my first game with the season tickets. It's a 4:05 start, which is awesome because we'll probably get a half day and I'll avoid Easter WEBS on NJ Transit. And God might have to overlook the hot dog that day. I don't believe in eating pizza, or anything other than a hot dog for that matter, at a baseball game...

Thursday, March 11, 2004

So I can't stand women who get dogs to be accessories. We were watching Newlyweds last night and Nick and Jessica couldn't agree on what kind of dog to get. He wanted an adorable husky puppy, she wanted a cute Maltese. But she was cooing and goo-goo gagaing over the Maltese and it was sooooooooooo nauseating. You could totally see her toting the thing around in a purse. Why do women behave this way with little dogs? What triggers this lap-dogs only reaction? I love all dogs (though after owning a Lab I do prefer bigger dogs) but I don't see why people treat little ones like dolls or something. Can't you just treat them like a normal dog? Sigh.
Yay for George Huff! I'm so psyched Simon picked him to go on in American Idol. There's a serious shortage of genuniely effervescent people on the planet, and George is one of them. Good to see him get rewarded despite looking "old."

And I find it highly suspect that two news stories about John McCain came out on the same day, ie, his possible vice presidential thing and the whole baseball steroid testing thing. Does he have a book coming out or something? Weird.

Tuesday, March 09, 2004

The freakiest thing just happened. Tonya told me to call the Yankee ticket offices to hear this funny-ass message left by DJ and A-Rod. They're all "Hi, I'm Derek Jeter" "And I'm Alex Rodriguez" and telling us to buy tickets and stuff so we can see them in person. It is the corniest message ever, so I was laughing and what should happen?? My Derek Jeter ornament falls off my computer. I swear. It's like he KNOWS. Knows what, I don't know, but I quickly apologized saying "We were laughing with you Derek, not at you." I mean, you can never be too sure...

Monday, March 08, 2004

So it appears our landlord hates us right now. Last night he came over to basically accuse us or the second floor of pulling the fire alarm which is complete bullshit because 1)The second floor wasn't even home when it happened (and I'd know because of their ginormous feet) and 2) IT WASN'T US! He was all "Well, the report is going to show which floor it was pulled on..." basically insinuating that if it was pulled outside one of our doors it's our fault. Like no one passes the first and second floors to get outside. I can't tell you how angry I was while speaking to him because I've been nothing but nice to him despite all of the lame assness of moving in, other situations he dumped on me, etc. So I finally started to give him attitude last night. Yes, me. He was all getting sarcastic about how nasty the walls and floor outside our apartment look (they got pretty scratched up when everyone moved in, but we didn't do it on purpose, for christ's sake. AND IT'S THE FIRST FLOOR THAT EVERYONE HAS TO PASS, HENCE IT WILL LOOK NASTIER THAN THE FOURTH FLOOR). He was like "Oh, don't you just love the decorating job in here?" I was just like "Yeah, whatever." I didn't even say goodbye to him, just sighed angrily.

I can't tell you how aggravating it is to be accused of something you had no part in. Yeah, we had a party -- one that ended a good three hours before the alarm was pulled. You can bet if he attaches a fine to our rent, it'll get fought. Geez, I thought I left living in the dorms behind in college...

Sunday, March 07, 2004

Welllllllll….Uh, that was an interesting day. I mean, you can never expect Faux St. Patrick’s Day in Hoboken to go without some kind of drama going down now can you?

The day on Grand St. began at 9 a.m., with Melissa cooking up bacon/egg/cheese English muffins so everyone would have the required sustenance for the coming hours. She and Carolyn and Rick then embarked on their FSPD adventures while I stayed behind preparing (rain and obnoxious bars does not a happy KB make) for the guests we were having later in the day and watching the Yankee spring training game, which was just way cool to see again.

Melissa came back just as I was pulling cookies out of the oven, and we fixed up the apartment all nice and shiny and pretty-like, when all of a sudden we hear some kind of commotion out our window (it was the one time during the day the sun actually came out for five minutes). Standing outside was an entire bagpipe and drum band, decked out in kilts and whatnot. They were apparently drawn in by the Irish flag hanging outside Sasquatch’s front railing (we have little ledges that look like balconies outside our apartments) and started talking to the girls on the 4th floor who were leaning out on their railing and the people hanging out outside our building. I guess someone requested a song because they started playing! Right there in front of our apartment building! It was by far one of the coolest things I’d ever seen. Melissa was so excited that she called her mom and she was like “Melissa, calm down, you’re Jewish not Irish.” I felt in touch with my own Irish roots and even took pictures so Carolyn would believe us when we told her. Sasquatch’s brother later said the band actually wanted to come up, which would’ve been awesome, but I don’t know if I’d want Sasquatch and bagpipes in the same room.

ANYWAY…everyone decided to show up at once and we had an instant party on our hands, complete with bagel bites and homemade pigs in a blanket. While I waited by the oven, Matt L. and I bonded over The Chicken (who was in hiding despite having a Leprechaun hat. I wasn’t about to leave him out to get kidnapped) and this stuffed pheasant he claims is like the mascot of a liquor store in NY. Hmmm…..

We played lots of Bruce (insert Jersey joke here if you like, but like our Irish roots, we our proud of our NJ heritage) and old-school hip-hop (big old sing along to It Takes Two to Make a Thing Go Right) and everyone’s having the most kick-ass time you can have on a fake holiday. Jesse is the first of the Hoboken Crew to show up and he claims he heard the bagpipers outside our apartment while he was waiting in line to get into a bar down the street. Rock on! We were like Grand St. celebrities. So we converse over pigs in a blanket and everyone singing along to Livin’ on a Prayer, and not ten minutes after he takes off, that’s when things got interesting.

I’m taking a timeout in my room when Melissa’s like “Our landlord is here.” Now, mind you, he’d been lurking around all day probably wearily watching our building and at this point (8 p.m.) he’s pissed for whatever reason. I can understand his concern, don’t get me wrong (his worry he claimed was that it was too crowded and that there were cigarette butts outside, though that was due to Sasquatch’s party not ours) but it was quite the “What the Fuck Moment” of the day. Our party had been spirited, but tame. No one was complaining to us about noise, no one was puking or passed out in the hallyways, and we planned to clean up our mess in the apartment like we ALWAYS DO when we have a party (which is actually quite rare). Carolyn and Melissa got more offended than I did at that moment and had a nice conversation with him. So did Sasquatch an his brother, who I think got threatened with eviction, and though I hate the loud feet, I don’t want to see them gone for having a freaking party where NO ONE WAS DOING ANYTHING AGAINST THE LAW. Or against the lease for that matter.

So at this point, I’m kind of upset and hiding in my room when my cousin Gina shows up for a bit, and just after she leaves, Liana shows up (The party hadn’t stopped despite the agitation). I decide to go back out to the party, which didn’t last much longer as the “incident” kind of took the wind out of everyone’s sails. Liana and I hung out, though, and Dexter and Vicki came over and we were having a nice quiet conversation when some jackass decides to pull the fire alarm in our building. Which is just way bad because it’s happened before and our landlord has gotten in trouble because the fire department actually has to come and turn the damn thing off. And just as the fire department shows up, who should decide to call but our landlord who’s asking me (my roommates were asleep at this point) what the hell’s going on. I tell him that there’s no smoke in the building, that the alarm probably got pulled and that’s that. And he did not sound happy. But it wasn’t anyone from my apartment who pulled the damn thing, so there.

And that was that. It was the best of times, it was the worst of times. It was Hoboken Faux St. Patrick’s Day in all it’s unabashed glory. I think I'll need a year to recover.

Friday, March 05, 2004

I can now never leave Hoboken. In addition to Barnes and Noble, Boston Market, Land-O-Lakes hot cocoa and Crunchie bars, there is now a cheesesteak place. Yes, real-deal onions and cheese, none of this "let's throw every condiment known to man on it" cheesesteaks. And while they're not as scrumptious as the are in Philly, or even Newark DE, they're good stuff. I practically danced home last night with my goodies. Life is good.

Thursday, March 04, 2004

The Green Stripe has been painted down Washington St. which can only mean one thing -- The Faux St. Patrick's Day of Annual Debauchery can't be far behind...

And how awesome is The O.C. for working in Journey last night? And how not awesome is America for giving young, old-sounding SiNOTra 28 percent of the American Idol vote, while old-looking, but young-sounding George is sent back to the wild card? Sigh.

Wednesday, March 03, 2004

I-tunes has this thing called Celebrity Playlists where musicians list the songs they would have on their I-Pod or whatever. While I don't have an I-Pod (Yet. I may cave one of these days), this would be one of my own, non-celebrity playlist. You probably won't be surprised that it's almost entirely from the 1980s:

Your Love, The Outfield. It came out in the 80s, but it totally reminds me of college.
Sherry Darling, Bruce Springsteen. It's a fun, summery song that works for both drunk and sober people.
Best of My Love, The Emotions. Because you can't have a playlist without good disco.
Town Called Malice, The Jam. The day sucked, but it sure can have a good beat!
Outstanding, Gap Band. The Gap Band is just awesome. This is my favorite song by them.
Separate Ways, Journey. "I must get the house clean, I must get the house clean!!"
Always Something There to Remind Me, Naked Eyes. I remember it playing on a lot of radios at the beach when I was a kid.
Biggest Part of Me, Ambrosia.To me, a great wedding song. It's upbeat, slow enough to slow dance to, not too sappy. A wonder more people don't use it.
Keepin' the Faith, Billy Joel. "The good old days weren't always good and tomorrow ain't as bad as it seems." Not bad words of advice, I think.
Hollywood Nights, Bob Seger. It's summer, the early 80s, my parents just got a new stereo from BEST and this is the record playing on it. I got lotsa Smurf toys that day too. Good stuff.
You are the Sunshine of My Life, Stevie Wonder. The song plays a big part in one of the later books of the series I'm writing and just works perfectly with it.
Under My Skin, Frank Sinatra. The orchestral arrangement is just awesome on this, and it's Frank Sinatra, enough said!
Spin, Lifehouse. It's too bad they've got a label as somewhat Christian music because this song has been out for awhile and I am nowhere near sick of it.
Roam, The B52s. -- Class trips in the 7th grade. Good times, good times.
Something About You, Level 42. Another 80s song that's just pure Sandy Hook in the summer.
Centerfield, John Fogerty. Spring? Baseball? Brown-eyed handsome men? Uh, hello!
Yeah, so I'm watching American Idol again this year. And I have to say I can't stand the red-headed kid, a.k.a. SiNOTra. He seems nice, and it's cool that teens are enjoying the Rat Pack, but the people who love him are confusing him with the real deal. The ones calling him Teen Martin -- ugh. He IMITATES Deano -- I don't think that's the sound of his real singing voice. And he lacks the pizazz of Sinatra and Dean Martin, so I don't get why everyone loves him so much. Because he's young and likes lounge music?? That shouldn't get you voted through when you're completely bland on a Billy Joel song.

Tuesday, March 02, 2004

I am so jealous of Tonya right now. She's heading out on business to LA this afternoon, home of the one and many Mrs. Beasley's. She thinks one of their fabulous stores is near her hotel. For some reason, they don't want to grow outside California and that totally sucks. I would live there if they moved to NY.
Et tu, Randy??? Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooo....
I'm not all too surprised about the reports about Jason Giambi actually taking the steroids, but I am disappointed. It totally explains why the Yankees went after Travis Lee, though -- God knows what Giambi's punishment will be. I'm not all that concerned about Sheffield -- I've been pretty indifferent about him, but this still kind of sucks. I guess some guys never got the memo about cheating in professional sports, but whatever.

Monday, March 01, 2004

So it wouldn't be Oscar night without a party at Dexter and Vicki's, complete with a huge spread of food, TiVo, a whole lotta wine and snarky commentary. This year also saw the return of Mike's SAT-like Oscar test, which I did OK on, largely in part to my love of the jumble. Other than that, I pretty much sucked at it. Dexter and Vicki came 1, 2 in picking the winners, so they are the psychic friends of the year. I am VERY interested to see how many of the 15 people there made it to work today. I had to drag my ass in because my boss is out, but you can bet I would've appreciated a few more hours of sleep.

I'm pretty happy Lord of the Rings kicked as much ass as it did. People have been complaining that it isn't fair for it to win because it's basically the trilogy that is winning, not just one movie. I don't have a problem with this because the past two years Oscar experts said it didn't get votes precisely because everyone was waiting for the third movie to come out, thus nabbing the awards then. In other words, they didn't want the same movie franchise winning every year, which is understandable. Plus, so what?! The people who made this movie literally gave up YEARS of their lives to make it and then it came out as well as it did. Believe me, if it's OK for Titanic to win, people should have had no problem with this one -- a much, much, much better movie than Titanic ever was.